WTF? Is the only three letters I can say without being too rude. What is going on here then?
“Facebook to shut down on March the 15th 2011.”
Erm, excuse me, have I missed something? Have I not just spent my last 2 years being totally addicted to you, like a relationship and you now what to end it all? I have seen you regularly, I check up on you EVERYDAY. I share my thoughts, photo’s, pastimes with you and I include you in ALL my events/parties/birthdays you name it I’ve been there. I’m hurt, shocked even. What do you have to say for yourself?
Don’t give me that blank expression. I’M NOT HAPPY!
Ok, just so you know I’m not going crazy. AT ALL. Let me explain, I was checking out social media news earlier today and came across an article that said that Facebook was going to shut down. I scanned everything, read everything to only learn that it’s not true. Phew! Someone’s happy little hoax sent thousands of Facebook users (including me and you no doubt by your facial expression 2 seconds ago) into a whirlwind of worry and a sense of betrayal that Mr Zuckerberg would do such a mean thing to us his devoted users who spend their time communicating with their friends online, playing social games and being just cool. How dare he, was my first reaction but thankfully I now want to know which funnyman out there thought this idea of a joke should get away with it. I want my 10 minutes of being worried and shocked back-replaced by happier thoughts.
This is what I had come across on TechWacky earlier today:
PALO ALTO, CA – Mark Zuckerberg announced that Facebook will be shut down in March. Managing the site has become too stressful.
“Facebook has gotten out of control,” said Zuckerberg in a press conference outside his Palo Alto office, “and the stress of managing this company has ruined my life. I need to put an end to all the madness.”
Zuckerberg went on to explain that starting March 15th, users will no longer be able to access their Facebook accounts.
“After March 15th the whole website shuts down,” said Avrat Humarthi, Vice President of Technical Affairs at Facebook. “So if you ever want to see your pictures again, I recommend you take them off the internet. You won’t be able to get them back once Facebook goes out of business.”
Zuckerberg said that the decision to shut down Facebook was difficult, but that he does not think people will be upset.
“I personally don’t think it’s a big deal,” he said in a private phone interview. “And to be honest, I think it’s for the better. Without Facebook, people will have to go outside and make real friends. That’s always a good thing.”
Some Facebook users were furious upon hearing the shocking news.
“What am I going to do without Facebook?” said Denise Bradshaw, a high school student from Indiana. “My life revolves around it. I’m on Facebook at least 10 hours a day. Now what am I going to do with all that free time?”
However, parents across the country have been experiencing a long anticipated sense of relief.
“I’m glad the Facebook nightmare is over,” said Jon Guttari, a single parent from Detroit. “Now my teenager’s face won’t be glued to a computer screen all day. Maybe I can even have a conversation with her.”
Those in the financial circuit are criticizing Zuckerberg for walking away from a multibillion dollar franchise. Facebook is currently ranked as one of the wealthiest businesses in the world, with economists estimating its value at around 7.9 billion.
But Zuckerberg remains unruffled by these accusations. He says he will stand by his decision to give Facebook the axe.
“I don’t care about the money,” said Zuckerberg. “I just want my old life back.”
The Facebook Corporation suggests that users remove all of their personal information from the website before March 15th. After that date, all photos, notes, links, and videos will be permanently erased.
Is this the end on internet?
Thankfully this is all very untrue as confirmed by All Facebook that the source to this rumour is by WeeklyWorldNews that have posted in recent times “Young Adults Moving Into Nursing Homes,” “Mike Tyson Pigeon fetish” and “Alien Spaceships to Attack Earth in 2011” basically says it all. Facebook”s Larry Yu (Facebook’s Director of Corporate Communications) posted a status soon after saying “We didn’t get the memo about shutting down, so we’ll keep working away like always. We aren’t going anywhere; we’re just getting started.” Thanks to the chaps at WeeklyWorldNews the impact of their little joke brought in 6,000 comments and some idiots out there are supporting a group which has nearly 2,000 supporters to keep their group/site/blog up. I for one won’t be supporting this.
Now I can breathe a bit better and get on with my day, check my Facebook status and carry on as if nothing happened.
How do you think you’d react to this news should Facebook actually close down?